My son
recently announced that he wants to start taking more risks. My eyes twitched,
followed by my head, and neck muscles. The sound from the back of my throat
came out like a scream, “What?! I fight hard to keep you alive and safe as it
is.”
In my mind his
statement said, “Ma, I have decided to increase the likelihood of something
happening to me.” Apparently, he meant taking chances, trying new things and
stepping outside his comfort zone.
As parents
we (you and I) raise our children to be independent, confident, and willing to
try things. Then when they become independent you’re like, wait, I didn’t mean
that independent. My son has me feeling like I need to create a maternal risk
assessment department that evaluates every decision he makes.
Just for fun
and to help us maintain our sanity, I’ve created a list of tips for parents of
risk-taking children.
1.
Take a deep breath.
Then take another one. You may be taking a lot of deep breaths from now on.
2.
Ask yourself: “Is this actually dangerous, or just something I wouldn't
do?”
There is a difference between dangerous and Mom doesn't like it.
3.
Remember: You raised them to be independent.
Unfortunately, they took you seriously.
4.
Try not to say, “I told you so.”
At least not immediately. Give it 30 seconds.
5.
Let them make some mistakes.
This is difficult for parents because
apparently we were not designed for this part.
6.
Resist the urge to give a 45-minute lecture.
They've already stopped listening at minute three.
7.
Remember that risk-taking can actually be a good thing.
Sometimes taking a chance leads to confidence, growth, opportunity and success.
Just make sure they're not taking the kind of risk that requires you to
identify them at the hospital.
8.
Set boundaries without trying to control everything.
Your job isn't to remove every risk from their life.
It's to make sure they understand the difference between “bold move” and
“bad decision.”
9.
Accept that you may never stop
worrying.
Parenting doesn't come with an expiration date.
Apparently, neither does a parent’s anxiety.
Disclaimer: tips were created using AI
During my
son’s school aged days, I remember signing many permission slips, and
participation waivers. As he transitions into adulthood, I feel that I should
have my son sign a waiver; One that states that he will not engage in any high-risk
activities that cause me anxiety.
Wha advice
would you give to a parent of a child who wants to take more risks?
